#11: We Only Have Control Over the Present
Dear friend,
Do you tend to fret about the future and forget about the present?
Confusion
“Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.” (Marcus Aurelius)
I was about to redeem the free waffles with ice-cream when the staff spoke.
“We’re extending the expiry date till June,” she said, looking at our loyalty card.
My husband was tempted to wait. We were ordering the same thing to qualify for the freebie.
I tried to change our order for variety, but the staff couldn’t comprehend.
Ultimately, my husband told me to decide. I breathed.
“We want to redeem it now,” I declared. We even took a photo with our waffle stacks.
That was April 14.
This Monday, after eight years, our ice-cream haunt wrote on Instagram that it was closing on May 1.
That was our last time visiting the outlet nearest our home.
Connection
We never know when’s the last time we do something or see someone.
Whether it’s a throwaway thing or sentimental love, the truth stays: we only have control over our present, not the future.
Yet we take safety in deferred deadlines or dreams. We think they’ll stay.
But even we change. We may not be the same person tomorrow.
Between the ages of 29 to 31, I kept wanting to go on solo trips. I honored my unexplainable urges, visiting places from Stockholm to UNESCO’s Cities of Literature.
Now, in my late 30s, I no longer have wanderlust. I only have literary ones that need no plane tickets.
And I have no regrets. Those were the golden pre-COVID years, when the world was also less complicated as a whole.
Clarity
Cherishing the present has lessened my “what-ifs.” I hug my mother every time I see her. I’m glad I started working on my writing dream although the path is rocky.
These prompts can help you make the best of the present:
- Quietly contemplate your well-being and fulfillment. What would you regret not doing right now?
- What’s preventing you from taking action?
- If today is all you have, what step would you take towards feeling more centered?
It’s scary to do something for yourself, even if it keeps you grounded and fulfilled.
Yet it’ll keep you from worrying too much about the future.
If you’re going through something rough right now, I’m thinking of you and sending you love. You’re already doing the best you can.
Always in your center,
Yiling
This was the song that played when I started writing this week's newsletter. I knew it was meant for you:
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